Sunday, August 26, 2007
Mixed Emotions >.<
Thanks to the greatest mum, I managed to find an excuse to not follow them to the trip.
I cried over the phone when he called me and finally, I convinced him
Anyway, I went out to Sunway Pyramid with a group of friends at around noon and spent a few hours walking around, looking at the cute things.
At around 4pm, I received a call from him.
Him: Where are you now?
Me: Sunway Pyramid?
Him: I’ll come over now.
Me: huh?
You never go for the trip?
Him: Nope. I want to give something to you.
Me: Okies. 
So, I met up with him and he passed me a big box.
-The Big Gift Box-
Him:
This is for you.
Me: Er.. What’s inside? 
Him: Just some little things
Me: Orhs
-looks at him with my usual blur expression-
Me: But why are you giving this to me? 
Him: It’s not all gifts.
There are also some things to return to you.
Me: Okay
-Some of the gifts inside-
I came home at around 6:30pm and came online to talk to dear. I continued chatting with my friends for the next few hours. I told him I received presents from him and he asked me to show him.
I was really stupid to have made you feel uneasy by showing the things to you.
*knocks my head*
Serene-Me:
You’re so stupid
Me-Serene: I’m sorry. 
Me-Serene: Please forgive me for being so silly?
Him: Did you buy anything?
Me: Not much but I received a gift box from him
Him: So good. 
Me: Er.. Yea
Him: Is it for your birthday?
Me: No. He said it’s because he made me cry.
Him: Orh.
What is it?
Me: I show you ba
Him: Hehe. Okies
-I didn’t know that I will make you feel jealous. Sorry-
I’m really getting stupid. Yesterday, you were so happy when you told me that you bought some gifts for me. My silly thoughts took over me and I started to feel guilty. I know you did all these to make me happy but somehow, I felt that you were comparing yourself with him. I don’t want you to do all these because of the other person. I only want you to love me. You don’t have to be too good to me. Perhaps, you want to treat me well really because you love me. And perhaps, I was really thinking too much.
-Sorry to make you cry again-
Him: I’m good to you because I love you. I cherish you. I want to do all these for you. If I need to choose again, I’ll still choose you.
Dear was right when she said that I am silly. I don’t even know how to protect others’ feelings and I’m claiming to make everyone happy. The more I try to cheer you up, the more I hurt you. I’m really sorry. Please let me learn to make you happy and not make you said. I don’t know if I’ll be able to do it, but, I promise I’ll try.
--------------------------
Learning to understand you
Trying to be a part of you
-It is love, because, I love you-
[Oinkz.QueeN] @ 8:30 PM
-Emo.QueeN-
I am Sleepyhead
Age : 90
Location : Ipoh
Occupation : part-time sales staff, full time slacker
Hobby : act blur, *pokes*, *bite* ppl
Em0tiONs-`y0uWEreNev3RtHeREwHeNiNeEd3dY0urL0vE
Sometimes, I do wonder how you define LOVE?
My definition :-
It is love when I feel happy to see you smile.
It is love when you keep appearing in my mind.
It is love when I'm willing to do just everything for you.
It is love when you say you love me, and tears start forming in my eyes.
It is love when I start to feel weird without you.
It is love when I am willing to let you go for your happiness.
It is love when we can understand each other without having to say much.
What about your definition?